News and Opinion from Sisters, Oregon

Commentary Coping with the loss of a pet

To someone who has never suffered the numbing loss of a beloved pet, a support group might seem kind of over the top.

So you lost a pet, the thought goes -- at least it wasn't a human member of your family; just get over it and get another kitten, puppy, goldfish, whatever.

Not so to those of us who were present at Sisters' first pet-loss support group meeting on Thursday, January 22.

Facilitator Kathy Johnson, who has lost two cats well before their time, is also a hospice volunteer and understands the grieving process very well. She encouraged stories and memories of those pets who were, in all cases, dear family members.

With a full box of tissues on the table, we told tales of how the "fur people," the dogs and cats and horses, had taken hold of our hearts and the great gaps that were left when they departed.

Sometimes the loss does feel deeper than an actual human family member. You know what they say about not being able to choose your family, and sometimes those familial bonds are tenuous. But the pets that leave holes in our lives with their deaths did choose us. They loved us unconditionally, let us expose our wounds, and if the beloved was a horse, they cared for our very lives.

Johnson said that we don't deal with death very well in our society and the loss of pets especially tends to be minimized. The purpose of the support group is to see us through our grief time, putting books on the table that can bring some sense to the emotions and allowing us that all-important time to share.

There may be some who are facing the imminent loss of a pet due to old age or illness. The Redmond Humane Society is behind the group and they have many resources available which can be of help during a painful time.

And all of us in the group have come through that phase. The group will meet every two weeks in the old Sisters Library building on Spruce Street (behind the current library). The next meeting is scheduled for February 5, starting at 6:30 p.m.

 

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