Carwash crooks

The following SPAM has apparently been circulating for about three years and just now caught up with me (compliments of my daughter Kristin in North Carolina, who sends me EVERYTHING!).

“Bill owns a company that manufactures and installs car wash systems. Bill’s company installed a car wash system in Frederick, Maryland.

“Now understand that these are ‘complete systems,’ including the money-changer and money-taking machines. The problem started when the new owner complained to Bill that he was losing significant amounts of money from his coin machines each week.

“He went as far as to accuse Bill’s employees of having a key to the machines and ripping him off. Bill just couldn’t believe that his people would do that, so they set up a camera to catch the thief in action. Well, they did catch him — on film! (Jim Anderson note: The “thief” in question is a European Starling, Sturnus vulgaris.)

“The bird had to go down into the machine, and back up inside to get to the money! That’s three quarters he has in his beak! Another amazing thing is that it was not just one bird — there were several working together removing what they thought were shiny objects. (Jim Anderson note: There were only two birds involved in the alleged “theft.”)

“Once they identified the thieves, they found over $4,000 in quarters on the roof of the car wash and more under a nearby tree. (Jim Anderson note: The part about the $4,000 is hard to swallow, probably a little ”literary license” there… It would require several months for the birds to haul off that much cash. According to my math that would be 16,000 quarters tipping the scales at around 200 pounds. Starlings are ambitious all right, but…)

OK, there it is — but — is it true? Yes, apparently (most of) it is.

I went searching for confirmation with the aid of Google (Google can find ANYTHING!), and hit http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/carwash.asp, which carried the heading, “Change is in the Air!” (I really liked that title!)

The Snopes version is very similar to the original, except for a few critical differences that involve the location and money (allegedly) “stolen” by thestarlings.

To begin with the event (apparently) happened in Fredericksburg, Virginia, not Frederick, Maryland, and the starlings were probably not attracted by the shining objects (quarters) as stated.

Starlings are cavity-nesters, and they were more-than-likely investigating the money machine‘s opening as a possible nesting site. Because starlings are one of the most insistent birds on earth, no hole is left unused.

(If you want to see an example of this, park alongside the highway on your next trip to Redmond and watch the starlings flying to and from the open holes on the end of the highline support arms attached to the huge steel poles alongside the highway.)

To the starlings, the quarters were an obstacle to a possible nesting cavity and had to be eliminated. Contrary to the tale about $4,000 in coins being found on the roof, a few quarters were found directly beneath the moneychanger and under a tree close by. That fits. The starling were just trying to get the stupid money out of their proposed nesting box and dropped it outside.

What all this boils down to is that starlings and house sparrows, because of their very nature and incredible ability to mimic other birds for food and shelter, will not pass up the slightest opportunity to nest anywhere in anything — like the house sparrow nesting in that old Texaco service station sign — which brings up the subject of evolution…

If you have trouble believing in the processes of “growth and change” (another term for evolution) look what has happened in the petroleum industry. The old Texaco brand has evolved into Shell in some places, but in others has become Texaco/Chevron, and BP is extinct. If that isn’t evidence of environmental factors affecting organisms, I’ll eat my hat.

Probably what we’ll see next are house starlings, European sparrows, and magpies in the bankingbusiness…