News and Opinion from Sisters, Oregon

When communication becomes compulsion

You're in the middle of a conversation with a friend when it happens. Your hand reaches out of its own accord and picks up your phone. Something is screaming inside you, "Gotta check my email! Gotta check my email!"

What's up with that?

You may just be a compulsive checker. You're not alone. Millions of people are more or less addicted to their cell phones. Too strong a word? Nope. Research has shown that the brain gets a little chemical jolt - a dopamine squirt - when we get messages (texts, emails, voicemails, whatever). It's pleasurable and we want to do it again. And again. And again... till we're like lab rats hitting cocaine until our heads explode.

An estimated six percent of people will interrupt sex to check email or text messages. And large numbers of people confess to checking their smartphone in church. While the comedic possibilities are endless, this can't be good, right?

William Powers, author of "Hamlet's Blackberry," told interviewer Katie Couric, "We've adopted this approach to these devices that says, the more connected you are, the better. I call it 'digital maximalism'; you can't be too connected. And it makes no sense in so many contexts."

The ubiquitous and constant use of digital devices - Powers calls them "screens" for short - has a powerful impact on the way we live, communicate and think. And often not for the better.

"When you're constantly living through the screen and toggling between different screen activities, you're really skating the surface; you can't go deep," Powers says.

Are you losing your ability to be absorbed in a novel? Are you distracted when you're talking to your friends or your kids? Do your Facebook friends get more attention than the people you interact with face-to-face? Has your attention span shrunk to that of a 4-year-old?

You're probably over-connected.

The compulsion can turn downright deadly when you take it on the road. Distracted driving is approaching drunk driving as a major contributor to accidents. Texting while driving is probably worse than being drunk. Frankly, it's nuts - but people can't seem to help themselves.

No one is arguing that "screens" - smartphones, iPads, your computer - are a bad thing. Access to quick, direct and easy communication has opened up the world in an unprecedented way. The question boils down to this: Are you using the tool, or is the tool using you?

If you think maybe the tool is using you (sorry, don't know what to tell you if you're interrupting sex for texts), perhaps it's time to take some steps to address the problem. Even if it's not yet an addiction, establishing some boundaries may help you avoid getting hooked in the first place.

Some people set a period of time, such as a weekend day, when they set their screens aside, turn them off. Tune out. For others, an effective trick is to create device-free zones. No phone in the bedroom; no phone in the bathroom, etc. If that causes anxiety for you, you know you really need to follow through.

You can turn off the alerts on your phone so you're not tempted to react to that beep that says you have an email or text. If you're out at a restaurant, you can block calls except for the babysitter, so you can relax knowing you'll get the only really important call. Let the others go to voicemail.

A smartphone can be a lifesaver out in the Sisters backcountry (and coverage is more and more complete). You can use maps and GPS, and if you get into trouble call 911. You can text other members of your party in the midst of a howling storm, like one group of backcountry trekkers did last week.

But the outback should be where you get away from it all, not a place to check your email and look at the latest viral videos. Put the screen away and use it only in an emergency.

If you're really hooked, the feeling of being disconnected will initially be uncomfortable, perhaps acutely so. But what are you really missing out on? Hopefully the ability to "go deep" again will more than compensate for that dopamine squirt. Rediscover the pleasures of just being still for a few moments. Enjoy an undistracted conversation; reengage with the world beyond the screen.

And maybe that screen device will once again be a wonderful, useful tool instead of an addiction.

Author Bio

Jim Cornelius, Editor in Chief

Author photo

Jim Cornelius is editor in chief of The Nugget and author of “Warriors of the Wildlands: True Tales of the Frontier Partisans.” A history buff, he explores frontier history across three centuries and several continents on his podcast, The Frontier Partisans. For more information visit www.frontierpartisans.com.

 

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