Of a certain age.....

As one year draws to a close and a new one dawns, many of us pause to reflect on what has been and on what we hope or intend for the coming year.

Rather than recycling resolutions about losing weight or de-cluttering my life, I have found it of much greater benefit to reflect on those events, individuals, and things for which I am grateful. What has occurred over the past year, who has been in my life, and what I have learned, provide much for which I have a grateful heart.

Acknowledging those people and occasions for which I am thankful helps me to understand better and see more clearly who I am. My gratitude helps highlight what matters to me, what and whom I care about, and where my energy and efforts could be best spent in the future.

By looking back with appreciation for what has been, I am better able to look forward, from a place of peace and hope for the year ahead. If I am resentful or discouraged in my review of the past year, that tends to color my expectations for the future. But if I can appreciate what I have learned from my past challenges, then I am able to forge ahead, equipped with the ability and experience to handle future obstacles.

I have found that, although it seems counterintuitive, my greatest gratitude is usually for those times that were particularly challenging or painful because of the lessons learned and the strength I discovered I have to prevail. I emerge a little smarter, a little more resilient to face future difficulties.

Gratitude and appreciation can bring light into the dark places; can shine hope and goodness into places of pain and despair. Gratitude can act as an antidote to depression, loneliness and fear.

One of the greatest gifts to come from life's challenges is the development of empathy for others' struggles. I am able to understand and offer support to others who are facing challenges similar to those I have encountered.

When I recognize the pain of a parent dealing with a child's addiction or other hurtful behaviors, I can offer an understanding and accepting ear. What I learned from my journey with my own child has given me tools to share with someone just embarking on or continuing to struggle with this heartbreaking trip. I can speak their language, understand their pain and fear, and offer support and guidance. For this I will always be grateful for the years spent and experience gained as a parent of an addicted child.

Feeling gratitude for my successes and happy occasions is pretty simple. They have provided the foundation on which to build future accomplishments. A job well done, a milestone reached, a difficult task completed, a meaningful relationship, a move made - for these it is easy to express gratitude and thankfulness.

When I earned my master's degree in my 50s, I was very grateful for the monetary resources and my intellectual abilities, which made it possible. At the end of 2004, I looked back with great appreciation for my new home in Sisters, following my move that May from the Seattle area. From the day I decided to move, everything fell into place, from finding my house in Sisters, to selling my house in Kirkland myself in one day, to having a job drawing on all my life experiences and training come to me.

Acknowledging those things for which I am grateful can also be a rewarding daily practice. Taking time each evening before sleep to review the day and recognize life's blessings in the last 24 hours is a meaningful exercise that helps me keep my head and heart in the game.

It is equally as important to express gratitude to myself as it is to express it to others. A grateful heart is open to love, to understand, and cannot harbor bitterness, hatred or fear.

As 2015 peeks over the horizon, I am grateful for a year filled with good friends, surrounded by the beauty of nature in a small town that has been my home for 10 happy years.

I am grateful for celebrating my 70th birthday in relatively good health. I am grateful that the health issues I do have are able to be cared for with adequate health insurance and access to good medical care.

I am grateful for the opportunity to use my writing talents because of all the interesting people I have met through interviews and their willingness to share their stories with me.

I am most grateful for my two adult sons, the fine men they have become, and their love and concern for my well-being. And I will forever be grateful for those difficult times in the past that have shaped me into the woman I am today.